Jump to content

Why The Seattle Bears are a Dumpster Fire [1/2]


eaglesfan036

Recommended Posts

Why The Seattle Bears Will Be A Dumpster Fire

 

1)      Past History:

 

Here is a tally of the number of playoff series the Bears have won since their miracle cup run in S43 (Hint, you can count on one finger)

 

image.png.e4a535b35c0428614bdddaa8fc74f499.png

 

Honestly, I expected this number to be zero, as the Bears are arguably the VHL’s worst run franchise for a long time running, consistently missing the playoffs or quickly exiting them. The funny thing is, there have been a few times Seattle had some regular season success, earning themselves a bye week in the playoffs. The only problem was they fell flat on their face during the playoffs, Dallas Cowboys style.

 

2)      Gabriel Mcalister’s Back Will Hurt

 

I know this series to suppose to trash teams, but I will admit that selecting Gabriel Mcalister was a good pick. The Cleveland Browns also made the right decision in drafting Myles Garrett first overall, so Seattle is being managed at least as well as the Cleveland Browns. Outside of McAllister, the Bears don’t have much else of a roster. Their 200 tpe goalie is earning tpe at a snail’s pace, Laflamme is going to go inactive, and then Banacock has his two roster players, one of whom we will get to soon. Outside of that, the roster is comprised of a bunch of inactive scrubs, so Mcalister will have to try and carry this team.

 

3)      The GM Values His Players Like A Homer on HFBoards

 

One of my favorite things to do on HFboards is read trade proposals from other teams’ fans to the Flyers, because there are often many homers (on both sides). For example, Canadiens fans probably think they can trade Andrew Shaw and a 4th round pick for Claude Giroux, cause Shaw is a beast and Giroux sucks. That is essentially what Banacock does, as he was demanding somewhere between 69 and 420 1st round picks for Federov these past few offseasons.

 

4) Karma for S42/S43

 

S42 and S43 was a ridiculous time for the VHL. Bushito was clearly on a downward spiral and going inactive, and blue team and the board of governors were en route to save Seattle and replace him. Instead, the Bears essentially formed a union and went on strike, led by @phil and @da trifecta, and said they would only play for Busito or they would quit. So the league decided to keep Bushito in place, and shockingly he went inactive. This led to Higgins taking over as the temporary GM, and Seattle rigging absurdly winning a cup they had no business winning. I believe that the Bears have been cursed for that abomination of a season, which is why we won't see them win a cup again until S84. 

 

5) The Bears Don't Have a Member of Blue Team on Their Team

 

Everyone knows the best way to win in the VHL is to have a member of blue team join your team? Why do you think Davos threw a party when Smarch became commissioner? If Davos doesn't win the cup this year I will donate 1 cent to everyone in the VHL.

 

image.png.a83d4162eca304c5e88d90e35991f114.pngImage result for dumpster fire

 

 

Edited by eaglesfan036
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • TheLastOlympian07 changed the title to Why The Seattle Bears are a Dumpster Fire [1/2]

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...